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Going to the Mattresses… Store

Going to the Mattresses... Store Blog by Chip Collins

by Chip Collins

“To sleep, perchance to dream,” pondered Hamlet in his time of deep reflection… a thought not uncommon in the wee hours of the night as an entire cross-section of the population tosses, turns, and stares at the dark ceiling above in a state of sleeplessness.

Sleep deprivation is insidious, and the cure can be equally evasive, resulting in a quiet army of zombies, so afflicted that their desperate plight inevitably results in the Godfather-worthy war-cry: “it’s all-out war: we go to the mattresses.”

Easier said than done, of course.  Perhaps the mattress is to blame.  Why not?!  After all it is the literal foundation of a good night’s rest.  Maybe it’s become a little too soft, or worn, or perhaps it’s taken on the profile of your body a little too exactly after night after night, year after year of your same, familiar sleeping position.

Or is it decade after decade?   Exactly how long has that mattress been in play?  It seems this is an area where we may tend to “set it and forget it.”  Until the mattress fails, that is…and that’s the rub.  By the time you realize it, it’s too late, and the army of zombies are forced out of their bedrooms and into the fray of the mattress industry.

Such was our recent plight.  Our mattress had progressively taken on the unmistakable shape of a W, positioning a nice hump between our respective sleeping swales, and it seems (despite numerous flips and flops as prescribed by the manufacturer) the inner workings of the mattress had finally decided to call it a day, leaving us increasingly uncomfortable at night.

So off we set in search of a new mattress, and what an industry it has become! Selective attention at this moment of foreign desperation yields a surprising number of options when it comes to mattress shopping. There are more mattress stores that you unwittingly drive by every day than you can hardly believe.  It’s uncanny… and, inside lies an ironically uncomfortable world of shopping a bit unlike any other.

From foam to springs to coils to toppers, the options are far greater than ever before, and the number of combinations of how to configure your perfect night’s rest multiplies when you consider box springs versus the newly popular adjustable bases.  Replete with power plugs and remote controls, options for beds are at an all-time high, which probably isn’t a great match for the mind-numb, sleep-deprived shopper who is simply desperate for a way to capture a solid 6-7 hours of rest.

But the shopping must go on, and so begins the awkward process of lying down on a myriad of sample beds in a fluorescent-lit store amid perfect strangers, all the while attempting to feel and define the subtle differences from one model to the next as you prepare to make a commitment that might last 10 years or more.  Not exactly a relaxing process…

Google to the rescue, as always, right?!  A simple search for mattresses under the “Shopping” tab should do it.  Reviews abound across an impressive array of options, with names as confusing as their features.  Purple, Black, Silver, Blue, Tempur, Sleep Number, and more…

Sleeping perfection delivered right to your door, often with a money-back guarantee.  It if weren’t for the daunting task of actually returning the rejects, this at-home shop-and-trial experience beats the mattress store all day (and night) long.

Whatever the solution – whatever it takes – the ends fully justify the means when it comes to re-establishing a reliable good night’s sleep.   So, if you’re in the ranks of the sleepless, and your mattress may be the culprit, take charge, be brave, and do “go gentle into that good night.”  The sheep are waiting to be counted…

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Untitled image by Charles PH @CharlesDeluvio, Source Unsplash

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